One Thousand and One AUs (The Continuation)

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One Thousand and One AUs (The Continuation)

Post by you're not my supervisor on Wed Feb 19, 2014 4:19 pm

So I decided to help Elder make AUs that I'll probably forget about. Yay!

TMI AU
No, not "too much information". Why would I make that? That's disgusting. "TMI" stands for "The Mortal Instruments", the first installment of which I finished reading yesterday. So there.

Basically, everyone is a Shadowhunter. Except you. I don't trust you with magical weaponry. (Hopefully you know which "you" I'm talking about.)


Kind of like a Psych AU I guess or something. Oh who am I kidding this is totally gonna be the Psych AU
I haven't really thought this through that much, but it's totally happening. Don't judge me. <.<
>.>
And now for the crappy, not well thought out character names:

Max Kattan is an annoying but hyper-observant smartmouth that starts a private detective agency with her best friend. She pretends to be psychic just for the heck of it, but the head detective of the police department doesn't believe her for a second.
Arthur Fusion is Max's best friend and partner at their detective agency, but he has a second job as a computer programmer. Depending on the day and the level of ridiculous, he generally either refuses to put up with Max's crap or goes right along with it. He gets especially grouchy when she calls him fun nicknames like "Polybotes Manson."
Esther Ridley is the head detective of the Xia police department. She's very fond of justice, and sticks to her guns. In general, she's extremely annoyed by Arthur and Max's antics, but she'll occasionally admit that they're helpful.
Dean McKay is Esther's partner. He's kind of a newbie, which frustrates Esther, but he's a good detective nonetheless.
Chief Dragon is the head of the entire police department, and decides who to assign to what case.
Brad Jones is the coroner, and is considered weird by most people, but the team loves him despite the weird.

Well since it has become apparent that I have no idea what I'm doing, I'm probably just going to quit while I think I'm ahead.

Actually, nevermind. Quitting while you're ahead is for losers:
Glee AU

Where we're all Glee characters! Very Happy:D:D

I'm going to die so bad for this. This is probably less desirable than the Homestuck AU.

Pirate AU

Because we need this one hella bad.


Last edited by Max the Pirate on Sun Feb 23, 2014 2:43 am; edited 2 times in total

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Re: One Thousand and One AUs (The Continuation)

Post by no mom its ironic on Thu Feb 20, 2014 12:49 am

i heartily approve of all but glee

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Re: One Thousand and One AUs (The Continuation)

Post by you're not my supervisor on Thu Feb 20, 2014 12:01 pm

I'll only make the Glee one if I hit absolute rock-bottom in the inspiration department. I can't even figure out how to make it work.

Also, probably updating the OP with actual info about the stories.

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Re: One Thousand and One AUs (The Continuation)

Post by no mom its ironic on Thu Feb 20, 2014 8:39 pm

yooo psych is cool

ridley 2good tho bro

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Re: One Thousand and One AUs (The Continuation)

Post by you're not my supervisor on Fri Feb 21, 2014 11:53 am

I'm not really sure how I got that.

Will probably work on more information soon.

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Re: One Thousand and One AUs (The Continuation)

Post by you're not my supervisor on Sun Feb 23, 2014 2:58 am

Chapter 1

Fuse's phone rang. He ignored it and continued working, deciding to let the call go to voicemail. It was only Max calling anyway, nothing that couldn't wait. The phone started ringing again, somehow seeming more insistent this time. Irritated, Fuse answered it.

"Max," he said in a measured tone, "this had better be of life or death importance. I'm at work right now. Like a normal adult."

"So, you know how my career as a roller derby girl didn't work out because of my low pain tolerance and lack of coordination?" Max chirped happily.

"Yes..."

"Well I decided to start a psychic detective agency! Wanna help me solve crimes?"

Very carefully, Fuse set the phone down on his desk to keep himself from throwing it through a window. He took several deep breaths before picking it back up.

"You did WHAT, now?"

"I started a psychic detective agency because I suck at athletics and need a job."

"Max, I'm not sure if you know this or not, but you're not actually psychic."

She ignored him. "I'm thinking of naming it 'Psych'. It sounds more modern than 'Max Kattan, PI', right?"

Fuse hung up. His friend had officially lost her mind.

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Re: One Thousand and One AUs (The Continuation)

Post by no mom its ironic on Sun Feb 23, 2014 3:03 am

Max the Pirate wrote:"So, you know how my career as a roller derby girl didn't work out because of my low pain tolerance and lack of coordination?" Max chirped happily.

2pro bro

looks good so far i eagerly await more huehuehuehuehue gibe chapter pls

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Re: One Thousand and One AUs (The Continuation)

Post by you're not my supervisor on Sun Feb 23, 2014 3:16 am

Indinana is (sadly) not in a different timezone from Ohio and it's 1:15 or so in the morning. I have to sleep sometime.

I say as I log onto Tumlr...

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Re: One Thousand and One AUs (The Continuation)

Post by no mom its ironic on Sun Feb 23, 2014 3:23 am

sleep is for the WEEAK

just like not being able to do the thing where you hstick your index and pinky finger out and keep the middle and the ring like tucked into your palm

apparently my brother is incapable of that while everyone else is like 'u weak'

he is a lamebutt

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Re: One Thousand and One AUs (The Continuation)

Post by you're not my supervisor on Mon Feb 24, 2014 10:19 pm

Chapter 2


When Fuse arrived at the address Max had texted him, he opened the door to find Max sitting in a desk chair, spinning around at an alarming speed. She was a blur of color and high-pitched squealing.

"Oh, hi," she said, standing up and almost falling over as she wobbled toward him, "You made it!"

"So this is the office then?" Fuse asked.

"Yeah! Isn't it great? I haven't thrown up while spinning around in my desk chair once. Now, can you help me move some stuff?"

"Max," he started as she grabbed one end of a desk, "how are you planning on pulling this off? As I said on the phone, you're not psychic."

"Are you sure?" she raised her fingertips to her temple. "I'm sensing you're wearing a blue shirt."

Fuse smacked her hand away. "Stop it, Max. This is serious."

"I can fake it, Fuse. I'm brilliant!"

"Well, now I get why you need my help. You're screwed without me."

"Maybe. Now will you please help me move this?" She grabbed the desk again.

Fuse sighed and picked up the other end. Together, they scooted the desk to the other side of the room.

"So why are you a 'psychic' detective, of all things?"

Max plopped down in her chair and proceeded to zoom across the room to the desk in it.

"Because," she said matter-of-factly, "'Kinda-Like-A-Modern-Female-Sherlock-Holmes-Type-Of-Thing Detective Agency' wouldn't fit on the door."

"Of course." Fuse was beginning to wonder if repeatedly banging his head against the wall was really such a bad idea.

"Of course, if anyone asks I may have to clarify, which could get old, but I'll jump in that puddle when I come to it."

"I'm pretty sure that's not the expression, Max."

"I wonder if they make pineapple shaped clocks..."

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Re: One Thousand and One AUs (The Continuation)

Post by you're not my supervisor on Tue Sep 02, 2014 11:59 am

I've been crappy about writing lately, so here, have the first chapter of some ill-advised project I started.

Charmed AU


Max really, really sucked at following directions, which was probably why, after Elder told her in no uncertain terms to stay out of the attic, Max couldn't stop thinking about going into the attic. She couldn't help it; she LOVED old houses, and the large Victorian that Elder and Fuse shared was right up her alley. All she could think about since she'd first laid eyes on the place was exploring.

She probably just doesn't want me to go up there because it's a royal mess, Max thought. Pff, like I care about that.

Still, she waited until her friends had left for work to explore the house. The attic was practically calling to her, saying "Max! Explore me! What if I have a window seat, would that not be the perfect place to read?" and Max agreed wholeheartedly. Window seats were so friggin' cool.

She climbed the staircase toward the attic, clutching the hardwood railing to keep from swaying like Captain Jack Sparrow. She had a tendency to do that when she was nervous. Old houses were totally her thing, but old staircases were not. They were usually skinny and steep and made her fear falling, and she had done enough falling down staircases when she was little, thank-you very much. Darn staircase.

Max pulled the sleeves of her sweater over her hands before turning the doorknob, OCD suddenly getting the best of her. Touching unfamiliar dusty things was a no-go if she was going to explore instead of running to a sink as soon as she felt even a little gross. She exhaled in determination and then pushed the door open, her sweater paws protecting her from all things icky.

Max wasn't sure what she'd been expecting- mutant bats, maybe? -but the attic was just an attic. Sunlight streamed through a small stained glass window and made the entire room feel warm, sunny and inviting; there were stacks of various things piled along the walls, dust swirled through the air, and in the very center of the room, a big, dusty old book sat on a stand of some kind.

Intrigued, Max walked over to the book. It's cover was probably supposed to be black, but it had faded over time, as had the various ribbons and other things sticking out of it like bookmarks. The cover was embossed with the words "The Book of Shadows".

"Ooh, spooky," Max said to no one in particular, her face sliding into her trademark smirk/bitchface combo.

Making sure her sleeves were still properly covering her hands, she eased the dusty cover open, not caring that she was probably inhaling ten million years' worth of dust. The yellowed parchment pages smelled amazing, and Max inhaled deeply, realizing too late that she was about to sneeze.

"He-CHOO!" she squeaked loudly, sending tiny moisture droplets everywhere. Glad nobody was watching, she wiped her face with a sweater sleeve and surveyed the book's pages for sneeze residue. Luckily, the damage was minimal, so she flipped to the next page.

"What's this," she wondered, looking at the words that had been carefully handwritten on the page, "some kind of poem or something?" She snorted. "I've found a giant book of really weird poetry on display in an attic I'm not supposed to be in. Wow, Elder. So spooky. I can totally see why you don't want me up here. Gosh, what's the meter of this, anyway?"

Max read the words out loud, trying to get a feel for how they were supposed to be read. Somehow, it was easier out loud. Her skin crawled with anticipation.

***

Across town, Elder felt herself shiver for no reason. She frowned. It wasn't cold or anything. In fact, Max had been the only one in the manor that morning wearing a sweater. Max had claimed the air conditioning made her cold, but it hadn't bothered Elder or Fuse. Come to think of it, Elder still didn't feel cold, so what was with the shivering all of a sudden?

***
Oh no, Fuse thought as an unwarranted tingling ran through his head, I do NOT need to deal with a headache right now.

He pressed his fingers to his temples, massaging his head. Oddly enough, the feeling went away on its own.

"You okay, dude?" one of his coworkers asked, looking over at Fuse with concern.

"Yeah, fine." He waved the guy off without looking at him. "Thought I was getting a migraine there for a second."

"Ooh," a female intern replied sympathetically. "I hate those! Let me know if you need me to get you an aspirin or something."

"Nah, I'm good. It's gone now."

Weird.

***
Max, feeling another sneeze attack coming on, slammed the book shut and ran from the attic, one hand pressed over her nose to keep from exploding everywhere. After shutting the attic door, she hesitated only a moment on the staircase before pounding down the steps and into the bathroom to find tissues.

Elder must never know about this, she thought blearily, blowing her nose for the fifth time.

Unfortunately, Elder finding out was, as always, inevitable. And she was not going to be happy with Max when she found out. That is, if she could figure out just what, exactly, Max had done.

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Re: One Thousand and One AUs (The Continuation)

Post by no mom its ironic on Thu Sep 04, 2014 2:34 am

dun dun dunnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn

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Re: One Thousand and One AUs (The Continuation)

Post by you're not my supervisor on Sun Sep 14, 2014 12:54 am

Charmed AU: Chapter 2


"I'm home!" Elder yelled as she came through the front door.

"Yay! I'm in the kitchen," Max yelled back. "I made dinner!"

Elder stepped into the kitchen, where Max was pulling a pan of meatloaf out of the oven.

"Oh, thanks," Elder said, mildly surprised, "You didn't have to do that."

Max tucked her hair behind her ear as she turned off the burner under a pot of green beans.

"Sure I did. Until I get a job, I need to do something around here, or I'll feel really bad."

She bent down and pulled three baked potatoes out of the oven.

"Well, it smells good."

"Thanks! Where's Arthur?"

Just then, the front door opened.

"Guys?" Arthur called from the entry hall.

"In the kitchen!" Elder yelled back.

"Something smells good," he said as he came into the kitchen.

"I cooked dinner!" Max said cheerily.

"Oh, cool!"

"I have meatloaf, baked potatoes, and green beans. Where the hell are the plates and silverware?"

"Oh, I'll get those," Elder said, grabbing a stack of plates out of a cupboard.

As she set the plates down, Elder, used to only dealing with two plates at a time, miscalculated the weight of the stack. The three plates tipped forward and fell toward the floor.

"Shit! No!" Elder instinctively threw a hand out to catch the plates, and they froze in midair. Max and Arthur both stopped and stared at the frozen plates.

"How are you doing that, E?" Arthur asked, a little scared.

"I have no fucking clue," she replied in awe.

Max knelt down and waved her hand under the plates.

"There's nothing holding them there!" she exclaimed.

Suddenly, the plates unfroze, landing in Max's hands.

"Ooh, that's not normal."

(Unfinished.)

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Re: One Thousand and One AUs (The Continuation)

Post by you're not my supervisor on Tue Feb 10, 2015 12:58 pm

I still haven't updated anything because I am t r a s h, but I came up with a new idea after watching Zoom and getting too excited about superheroes in general.

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Re: One Thousand and One AUs (The Continuation)

Post by you're not my supervisor on Wed Feb 11, 2015 5:18 pm

WHY DO I HAVE TO BE SO FOCUSED ON BACKSTORY THIS IS TAKING FOREVER.

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Re: One Thousand and One AUs (The Continuation)

Post by you're not my supervisor on Tue Apr 07, 2015 10:46 am

AU where the LoX crew are Marvel heroes:

Fuse = Tony Stark (Iron Man)
Saivel = Natasha Romanoff (Black Widow)
Kaime = either Danny Rand (Iron Fist) or Groot
Venia = Mayday Parker (MC2 Spider-Girl)
Aaron = Bucky Barnes (Captain America)

AU where they're all Marvel villains:

Fuse = Dr. Connors (The Lizard)
Saivel = Blackie Drago (The Raptor)
Kaime = Raven Darkholme (Mystique)
Venia = Dottie Underwood (Black Widow)
Aaron = Bucky Barnes (The Winter Soldier)

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Re: One Thousand and One AUs (The Continuation)

Post by no mom its ironic on Thu Apr 09, 2015 2:39 am

i just realized aaron's bucky in both

nice

(also kaime as groot i s2g)

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Re: One Thousand and One AUs (The Continuation)

Post by you're not my supervisor on Thu Apr 09, 2015 9:55 am

It worked too perfectly both times I couldn't resist.

And Kaime would be cute as Groot, but he's definitely a lot like Danny as well. At least, he's like the Danny from Ultimate Spider-Man on Disney XD.

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Re: One Thousand and One AUs (The Continuation)

Post by you're not my supervisor on Sat May 16, 2015 11:03 pm

I wrote an angsty backstory for Aaron but the time period doesn't feel far enough back in history to mesh with the rest of the plot, so let's just pretend it's an AU or something brb gonna go cry

Also, there was one scene that felt awkward to write but nothing actually happened? Like, everything is purely open to speculation, but it still feels awkward. Sorry.

Backstory, Bitches:
They say that in London, the fog can kill; but what lives inside the fog is deadlier by far. Her name is Brigid Logan, and she never forgets a face, never forgets a name, never forgets a scent. She never gives up on her quarry, and she never gets caught. Some call her a demon, some swear she came from Tír na nÓg, but they all agree that she's far worse than any fog, no matter how full of coal dust.

On the day that Byron Frye, English Ambassador to France, found that his wife was incapable of bearing children, he was heartbroken. He and his wife, Grace, had often dreamed of having a son, but eventually resigned themselves to the fact that childlessness for the Frye family was simply the Order of things. Fortunately for them, Chaos had other plans.

One summer, a week before they were to leave for France, the housekeeper found a baby on the front porch of the Frye home in England. There was no note with him, no name embroidered on the blanket he was wrapped in, or any form of identification at all. So the ambassador and his wife took the boy in and named him Aaron, which meant "exalted", and raised him as their own. They loved their adopted son deeply, and he certainly lived up to his name. But Chaos wasn't finished with Aaron Frye.

He was eighteen when Chaos returned for him, and on that particular night, he was celebrating. In two days time, the Fryes were returning to France. Aaron did not have much love for London's particular atmosphere, and to leave would be a relief.

The waning red light of evening guided Aaron through the fog and into a tavern. That's when his eyes - grey at the time - met hers - violet - across the room. He was transfixed. She decided she'd found a new plaything. So he bought the first round of drinks, and she bought the second, and - transfixed by her eyes and their conversation - he didn't notice that the drinks kept coming, and that the bartender was looking at him knowingly (he was also one of hers), and that when they eventually left together, Brigid was still as sober as could be. Still under her spell, he followed her through the streets, allowing her to steer him, their laughter echoing through the streets.

The laughter continued all the way back to Brigid's flat, where they barely made it to the bedroom before falling on the floor together. There, Aaron's laughter gave way to screams as Brigid's fangs sank into his neck. No one heard, but in that part of town no one would've noticed anyway.

In the morning, he couldn't remember where he was, or why his head hurt, or why he wasn't wearing his clothes. All he knew was that Grace would be worried and Byron would be furious and he needed to get home. So he found his clothing and stumbled around the back streets looking for somewhere familiar.

Eventually, one of his mates saw him and led him home, and Grace was worried, and Byron was furious, but Aaron was home and that was all that mattered.

Grace, clearly seeing that something was wrong, helped her son to bed. He fell asleep almost instantly. Grace didn't want to leave him, but did anyway, knowing that the best thing she could do for the time being would be to let him sleep.

Aaron slept most of the day, didn't eat much, and barely left his room. Byron mentioned delaying their departure for France for a few days, but Aaron wouldn't hear it. He would be fine the next day, he insisted.

He wouldn't remember waking up in the middle of the night to find Brigid standing over him, one hand over his mouth to silence his screams as she fed from him a second time. He was barely aware of a maid finding him the next morning and shrieking when she saw how pale he was. He didn't know that Byron had summoned the family doctor until the doctor was at his bedside, telling the Fryes that he couldn't help Aaron because he couldn't figure out what was wrong. He didn't notice Grace sobbing as she held his hand, or Byron watching them gravely, tears forming in his own eyes. He was too busy simply trying to breathe.

That night, Brigid came for him the final time. She carried him off, completing Aaron's transition into a vampire back at her flat. But this time, Aaron didn't forget. Instantly, he realized she was to blame for everything he had been through in the past few days, and Brigid barely escaped with her life. She hadn't counted on his tenacity, or his love for his family. She cursed herself for choosing someone so young.

But Brigid was not one to give up so easily. She ran straight to the police, warning them that she'd found the serial killer who'd eluded them for so many years. She'd barely escaped with her life, she sobbed, and the killer was almost certainly still after her. She led the officers straight to Aaron, who was too disoriented to put up a fight when the officers decided that the blood on his hands was enough evidence to incriminate him.

Sitting in a prison cell, he could feel himself changing. His hunger grew, taking over every part of him. When the guards came to take him to his hearing, he killed them and anyone else who got in the way of his escape, and he didn't look back once. Wracked with guilt an hour later, he tried to drown himself in the Thames, and when that inevitably didn't work, he fled the city.

Aaron spent the next year running from Brigid and her men. He couldn't sleep, and neither did they, and he ran until he couldn't anymore. And then he ran some more, eventually ending up on the island of Xyla, where he met a boy named Toby and a woman with a monkey and a whole bunch of her friends. They saw what he was. They didn't care. They were different, too, and they decided he belonged. And Chaos finally let him go.

Oops, I accidentally gave it a happy ending. There you go, Elder.

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Re: One Thousand and One AUs (The Continuation)

Post by no mom its ironic on Sun May 17, 2015 12:56 am

D:

D::::

max, max why do you DO T HIS TO M YH EART

was aaron's dad actually a blacksmith or is my brain playing tricks on me? either way mAAXX WH Y

guy has confirm that aarons dad did like, military shit or something. not just my brain

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Re: One Thousand and One AUs (The Continuation)

Post by you're not my supervisor on Sun May 17, 2015 1:06 am

I didn't really come up with details about his biological parents other than his dad was Russian and his mom was German and it took a LOT of booze to get him drunk.

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Re: One Thousand and One AUs (The Continuation)

Post by no mom its ironic on Sun May 17, 2015 1:11 am

nice

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Re: One Thousand and One AUs (The Continuation)

Post by you're not my supervisor on Sun May 17, 2015 1:50 am

I've been laughing about that part for days.

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Re: One Thousand and One AUs (The Continuation)

Post by no mom its ironic on Sun May 17, 2015 3:17 am

sHITwhat am i doing with my life i didn't see the (the continuation) excuse me

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Re: One Thousand and One AUs (The Continuation)

Post by you're not my supervisor on Sun May 17, 2015 3:47 am

Yes dear.

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Re: One Thousand and One AUs (The Continuation)

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